Kim Tae-hee's Honest Confession on Love, Motherhood, and Finding Herself Again

Kim Tae-hee fell for Rain because of his thoughtful, humorous efforts.
She found early parenting intensely difficult.
She is now reclaiming her acting career and embracing aging with a positive mindset.

In a remarkably open and heartfelt appearance on tvN's 'You Quiz on the Block', actress Kim Tae-hee offered a rare and profound look into her life beyond the glamour, sharing the intricacies of her marriage to superstar Rain, the overwhelming challenges of motherhood, and her personal journey with self-acceptance. The conversation painted a picture of a woman deeply dedicated to her family yet consciously reclaiming her own identity.

Kim Tae-hee and Rain, one of Korea's most celebrated power couples, married in 2017 after five years of dating. Their relationship, however, was far from a whirlwind romance.

"It wasn't love at first sight. I acknowledged him as a popular, hard-working actor and singer, but it wasn't love at first sightt," she clarified.

The connection grew gradually through Rain's thoughtful and persistent courtship. He won her over with unburdensome gifts that spoke to his character, scented candles, an MP3 filled with songs.

"I thought, 'That's how I feel about expressing my feelings through music,'" she shared.

The pivotal moment that truly disarmed her was a cleverly hidden love letter inside a novel.

"He gave me a novel as a gift. He said he enjoyed reading it, so I took it. After a while, I was having a bit of a hard time. I was wondering, 'What should I do?' and then I said, 'Let's just read the book and go to bed.' After a while, I opened the book and saw that the front page was filled with a letter. There wasn't much content, but when I was feeling down and tired, I opened it and burst out laughing. That's why it became a point of disarming me."

This gesture was so powerful it caused her to break her own rule and contact him first. "It made me laugh anyway. Before that, I'd just accept calls and never initiate contact. I didn't have feelings for him, but I could give him some leeway. I first texted him after seeing his handwritten letter."

The Overwhelming Transition into Motherhood

The fairytale quickly transitioned into the intense reality of parenting. Kim Tae-hee revealed that she had a "honeymoon baby," meaning her journey into motherhood began almost immediately after marriage. She was brutally honest about the shock.

"Actually, I got married, had my first child as a honeymoon baby, and then transitioned into parenting. Raising a child was so much harder than giving birth, I thought a second child would be impossible."

The stress was so immense that it triggered what she described as a delayed "puberty" in her 40s, where she found herself rebelling against the advice of her own mother, a deeply dedicated caregiver.

"Because our standards are different, puberty, which I didn't experience even during my school days, came to me in my 40s, and I wanted to keep rebelling against what my mom said, and everything sounded like nagging," she explained.

Then, Kim Tae-hee becoming emotional as she recalled this difficult period and the guilt she felt.

"I was stressed out from parenting. Now that the kids are grown, I'm really comfortable, but I feel like I did something wrong to my mom when I was going through the most emotionally difficult time."

Through it all, Rain has been a steadfast, though humorously imperfect, partner. She debunked his claim of being a "dead leaf" at home.

"That's not true. You know my husband. He's such a strong-willed person. Even at home, he has a great image. I think he's managing his image. He's not like a dead leaf. Absolutely not."

His support is shown in his own way: he's the fun parent who "always buys them gifts and gives them junk food," while she focuses on health. This dynamic sometimes leads to tension, which she candidly admits is part of the "emotional labor" of parenting, causing her to sometimes "end up making a face at my husband." Yet, his unwavering belief in her career never wavers, as he was the one who strongly encouraged her recent work trip, telling her, "It's a chance to promote the work, but also to make the actress Kim Tae-hee known."

Now, as her children are older, Kim Tae-hee is navigating a new chapter focused on self-rediscovery. This includes a renewed thirst for acting.

"I want to burn brightly in my projects," said Kim Tae-hee.

At 45, she reflects, "I liked my appearance the most when I was thirty. There will always be things I dislike. I think it's inevitable that I'll have to accept it as I get older, and I hope people will look at the wrinkles I've developed from smiling a lot as positive and pretty."

Her deepest personal desire is simple yet telling of a mother who has given so much of herself.

"I think just being alone would be wonderful… I want to have a lot of time for myself."

It’s the honest confession of a woman embracing every facet of her life, from the struggles to the joys, with grace and resilience.

Source: tvN's 'You Quiz on the Block', Chosun